Jasper and I are in OR. We are visiting family and old friends, and checking out the engineering school at OSU for potential LaFortune enrollment. We drove the little car. We each packed a bag. One small sack of groceries and a credit card. Simple trip. No outdoor gear beyond a pair of running shoes each.  Little mess.


There has been a lot of eating and drinking. A few walks and even fewer runs. Things are close here. There hasn’t even been much car time. Lots of talking, lots of sharing, a movie…and lots of plans to get together again soon. A 18 month old, talkative 5-year-old, crowed kitchen tables and having to go to the neighbors to get more chairs.


Jasper and I have been living on our own for the last 3 months. Just he and I rattling around in a big house. Jasper is very easy to live with. He is a teenaged boy, and he sleeps a lot. His food tastes are simple…there just has to be quantities of protein. Jasper is pretty self-contained, and he is neat. He always hangs up his towels, he cleans up after himself, he does his own laundry. He will tell me what is on his mind, but I have to ask.

I miss the mess. I miss coming downstairs in the morning and wondering what happened after I went to bed last night. I miss negotiating how I can get dinner on the table with 3 different schedules all competing for the same 1/2 hour time block. I miss the interrupted conversations. I miss the mess of an intimate relationship, figuring out how to get my needs met without hurting someone else’s feelings or bumping up against their needs.

Trips with a little car and even less gear are fun and refreshing for a change. A life without mess is neat…and not one I chose to live. Yes, we will get together again soon. Bring on the mess! And, no, Jasper, this does not mean I’ll start doing your laundry again.

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One Response to Mess

  1. Joan Jones says:

    You know a *lot* of people who smile a *lot*…or maybe you just bring that out in them…

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